By: Nikos Mixas
Here’s
the August edition of THE
SLUDGELORD’s “666
Pack Review”. What happened to
July’s? Fuck July, it’s in the rearview
mirror now. Yours truly was attending
both Brutal Assault and Psycho Las Vegas during August so deal with it. Most of you probably didn’t even notice
anyways. So, if you’re new to this, each
month we handpick 6 review submissions and critique them by only using 6 words,
then we rate them on a scale from 1 to 666! Check out our no one cares themed rating
scale below:
1 –
No one cares! At all!!!
2 –
Only your friends will pay attention to this nonsense.
3 – Only 5 out of 10 listeners
will care…
4 –
I think you’ll get some of your Bandcamp followers to care.
5 –
I actually care about this, that’s saying a lot for this column.
666 – THE SLUDGELORD cares so much that you’re getting a perfect
rating. This is definitely rare and
something to be proud of.
Caveat: Even though the “666 Pack Review” is meant
to offer humorous critique, there are no safe spaces here and your gripes will
only make you sound like a bellyacher. THE SLUDGELORD is a
picky listener…and doesn’t care what you think of his opinions….
1).
Old Horn Tooth “From The Ghost Grey
Depths” (London, U.K.) Rating:
666!
God-doom fucking-tastic start to the month!
2).
Phantom Hymn “A Story of Days to
Come” (Portland, OR, U.S.A.) Rating:
4
Not really Sludgelord-y, but good nonetheless.
3).
Stonekind “EP” (Winston
Salem, NC, U.S.A.) Rating: 4
Desert
grooves matched with scorching vocals.
4). MAIRU “The Sacred Dissonance” (Liverpool, U.K.) Rating: 5
5).
The Lightness of Being “Stay”
(single track) (London, U.K.) Rating: 5
Deftones
comparisons aren’t a reach here.
6).
Sleeping Giant “Sleeping Giant”
(Bendigo, Australia) Rating: 4
Australian
stoners out smoke Christian version…
Bandcamp:
Old Horn Tooth
|| Stonekind
|| Mairu
|| The Lightness of Being || Sleeping Giant
