Thursday 20 July 2017

6 NEW BANDS: Nikos Mixas' 666 Pack Review July 2017

By: Nikos Mixas
By: Joshua M. Wilkinson

It’s the July edition of THE SLUDGELORD’s 666 Pack Review!  We’re over halfway through the year and it’s about as hot as it’s going to get!  So….it’s time to drink beers and review bands!  If you’re new to this, each and every month we handpick 6 review submissions and critique them by only using 6 words, then we rate them on a scale from 1 to 666!  Check out our awesome (burp!) rating scale below: 

1 – I liken this band to having too much to drink.  I’m going to get sick… 
2 – Two is a lonely place to be…like drinking by myself. 
3 – If you want to be just average, like a pilsner, that’s cool with us.
4 – Four, four beers makes you good…just like fried pork rinds.   
5 – This is solid stuff and that’s not the alcohol speaking! 
666THE SLUDGELORD thinks that you deserve a keg party for your efforts! 

Even though there was some partaking of adult beverages during the review process, let’s make it clear that it was done responsibly…with metal!!!  THE SLUDGELORD is a picky listener…and doesn’t care what you think of his opinions….

Bonglord - “Bonglord” – (Ann Arbor, USA)    Rating: 2

Not even bongs can save them….

Ogimaa - “Desolation” – (Winnipeg, Canada)   Rating: 4

Sick guitar tone makes me happy.

Gamma Goat - “Nocturnal Harvest” – (Gilman, USA)   Rating: 3

Soundgarden meets The Sword meets beer.

Ripis  - “Monolith” – (Austin, USA)   Rating: 5

Windhand and Cough orgy with Pabst

Cutlass  - “Cutlass” – (United Kingdom)   Rating: 1

I changed my rating twice…ugh…

Elder Devil  - “Graves Among The Roots” – (Fresno, USA)   Rating: 666!

Went to the school of NAILS.

Band info: Bonglord || Ogimaa || Gamma Goat || Ripis  || Cutlass || Elder Devil